Welcome to
The Art of Parenting While Sick.

Find research-backed and age-appropriate tools, tips, and scripts to improve communication and coping skills in your household so you can raise happy, confident, and emotionally resilient children even while navigating difficult circumstances.

"Thank you for making me feel part of something bigger. I get so scared feeling alone with this."

– Kerry, a parent

"I really loved the scripts and the clear information. It was presented in a really understandable way and very useful."

-Training participant

"I just want you to know that I love your website and how helpful your advice is to put into action."

-Anne, a parent

Hundreds of millions of parents around the world struggle with chronic health conditions.

Many of these conditions are unpredictable and, at times, debilitating, such as kidney disease, diabetes, rheumatoid arthritis, lupus, sarcoidosis, multiple sclerosis, Parkinson’s, Grave’s, Crohn’s, Addison’s, endometriosis, myasthenia gravis, scleroderma, myalgic encephalomyelitis, and many more.

These conditions can cause flare-ups, unexpected hospitalizations, and the need for us to have difficult conversations with our children, yet that reality is rarely addressed in most parenting books, podcasts, and articles.

That is why I created The Art of Parenting While Sick. The age-appropriate tools, tips, and scripts on this site will help you:

talk to your child about your condition
prepare your family for an unexpected hospitalization or medical emergency
teach your child when and how to call emergency services
explain a heritable condition
communicate with teachers, coaches, and other adults in your child’s life about your condition
parent from the couch during flare-ups and other difficult health days
prepare for pregnancy, childbirth, and breastfeeding with a chronic condition — and much more

The Art of Parenting While Sick helps parents with chronic health conditions feel seen and supported and find solidarity in a global community.

Scripts, guides, and other tools.

These resources were developed in collaboration with parents, clinicians, genetic counselors, child and family psychologists, and child life specialists.

Talk to your child about your condition

Follow this 5-step script to talk to your child about new or changing conditions, flare-ups, treatment changes, and more.

Help your family handle a hospitalization

Learn how to prepare other caregivers for what to do if you’re unexpectedly hospitalized, what they should say to your children, how to make hospital visits feel safe, and more.

Talk to your child's teachers, coaches, and caregivers

Follow this short 5-step script to brief the people in your child’s life if your condition is having an impact on their schedule, schooling, and so on.

Teach your child to talk to emergency services

Use this guide to help your family members feel prepared to talk to dispatchers and EMTs if you have a medical emergency.

Talk to your doctor about family planning

Bring this list of questions to your doctor to ask how your condition could impact your fertility, pregnancy, childbirth, medication use, postpartum care, and more.

Read what other parents with chronic conditions say

Learn what 26 parents from 8 countries struggle with most and what kind of resources they need.

Parenting with a chronic condition

In the survey, I asked parents about what they struggle with most in their day-to-day life as a parent with a chronic condition.

26

parents

08

countries

20

conditions

Keping up with children is hard when you're not feeling well.

Which of these is hardest for you?

not meeting my child's social needs

81%

not meeting my child's physical needs

77%

having to miss my child's events

66%

not being able to travel easily

43%

struggling to help out with daily housekeeping

41%

Words from my partners.

"Having Hilary on Quiet Connection was a deeply memorable experience; her refreshing honesty and vulnerability about the daily realities of parenting with chronic illness provided the exact validation and grace that so many families desperately need to hear."

— Chelsea Myers · A Quiet Connection podcast

"Hilary is giving voice to a neglected population by providing the tools and vocabulary they need to better connect with their loved ones."

— Krisann Valdez · Journalist

"The experience, knowledge, and resources Hilary provides is imperative for families and caregivers. Parents are always reaching out looking for support and being able to connect them with the work that she is doing has been an absolute game changer. I'm deeply grateful for all that she shares with our community."

— Vanessa O’Rourke · National Adrenal Diseases Foundation

Questions, answered

Who are The Art of Parenting While Sick resources for?

The resources on this site are for any parents, grandparents, and other caregivers who are managing a chronic health condition, as well as the clinicians, nurses, and foundations who support them.

By chronic condition, I mean a long-term genetic, autoimmune, infectious, or other serious health condition that meets one or more of the following criteria:

has lasted at least one year or more and requires ongoing medical care
limits your daily life, including work, parenting, social activities, or household responsibilities
causes ongoing symptoms or unpredictable flare-ups
may worsen over time or go into remission and return
can require emergency treatment or hospitalization
requires ongoing medication or treatments (such as dialysis) to stay well

And I’d like to note: it takes an average of 4.5 years to be correctly diagnosed with an autoimmune disease and 6.5 years for genetic diseases so if you have symptoms but don’t have a diagnosis yet, I’m sorry you are on that [often lonely] journey and please know that you are welcome and part of our community, too.

Are the resources free?

Yes. All the scripts and resources on the website are downloadable and free. The monthly newsletter is also free.

Do you add resources to the site regularly?

Yes. I regularly add new downloadable PDFs, videos, links to research, and other resources to the site.

If there’s a topic you’d like to see me cover that is not on the site, please feel free to send me a note through the contact section. I love hearing from patients, clinicians, and foundations about what they need.

Can you speak at our event or train our team?

Yes. I partner with foundations, hospitals, and clinics to provide trainings on all the topics on this site and more. You can reach me through the contact section on this site.

The Art of Parenting While Sick: the book

As a mom with two chronic conditions—severe asthma and Addison’s disease—I’d been in the hospital five times before my son turned three. I was anxious about how my unpredictable health was going to affect him.

But when I went online to find a book to help me, I was surprised when I couldn’t find any. So, I decided to write the book I needed (and I think a lot of other parents do, too!)

In the book, I offer tools, tips, and scripts for how parents can:

talk to their children about their illness, flare ups, hospitalizations, medical emergencies, and surgeries
come up with household guidelines to help the whole family manage their condition
parent from the couch on rough days
talk to their doctors about pregnancy, fertility, and heritable conditions, and much more.

I also tell the stories of 16 parents I interviewed from around the world struggling with a wide array of conditions, including recurrent cancer, myasthenia gravis, amyotrophic lateral sclerosis (ALS), Parkinson’s, cystic fibrosis, kidney disease, endometriosis, depression, lupus, type 1 diabetes, and more.

✿

Welcome to The Art of Parenting While Sick.